Calla Appears Before the Queen
“Now presentin' Calla Fo'sythia,” Dahoon said, steppin' in front of Nikki t'assert hisse'f. Calla looked like she was attendin' her own funeral as she stepped in, th' dores closin' heavily behind her. “Howdy, Lady Fo'sythia,” th' Queen greeted fo'mally. Calla bowed, but did not lower her eyes, as eff'n she suspecked an attack. “Recent events haf made clear t'me thet th' link is ingood 'nuff fo' rootin' out all disloyalty.” Calla raised a fine-scu'pted red eyebrow. “Recent events?” “Yessuh, th' spikin' of our trees. Whuffo', whut did yo' reckon th' fo'ess referred to?” Her eyes darted aroun' t'gage th' reackshuns of them present. “Nothin', yer Highness.” “Indeed, cuss it all t' tarnation. Th' enemah is makin' corntack wif members of th' fo'ess to cornspire aginst us. Th' methods used kinnot be detecked through no'mal means. As sech, noo measures is necessary t'maintain harmony, so ah's creatin' a noo posishun of Internal Investigashuns t'unearth an' scrutinize communicashuns made between our varmints, so thet enny disloyalty may be brought t'light.” “An' ah suppose ah will be th' fust t'be investigated?” Th' Queen elegantly rested her han's in her lap. “No, ah's appointin' yo' t'th' posishun.” Call blinked, cuss it all t' tarnation. “Whut in the, I say, whut in the tarnation, me?” “Yessuh, of course. Yer fo'ess has need of yer services. Will yo' accepp?” Calla looked aroun', as eff'n suspeckin' an ambush. “Um…yes, of course. ah suppose.” “Mighty fine, then, as enny fool kin plainly see.” Nikki walked up an' han'ed Calla her unifo'm, badge of office, an' misshun statement. Calla noted wif distaste thet th' unifo'm was almost identical t'an Alliance military unifo'm, dawgone it. “So, ah will be keepin' watch on over the…yankees?” Th' Queen shook her haid. “Yer autho'ity will be limited t'Wysterian womenfolk only. Navy security an' th' royal guard will corntinue t'han'le investigashuns involvin' fo'eigners o' men, as enny fool kin plainly see.” She looked at th' clo'es on over sco'nfully. “Yo''d haf me dress in an Alliance Unifo'm? I’ll become a pig in a stye.” “Yo' may decline th' hono', of course, but keep in mind, whoevah ah appoint in yer stead will eventually git aroun' t'investigatin' yo' varmintally.” Calla groun' her teeth. She clutched th' unifo'm tightly inough t'wrinkle it, an' stomped outta th' court wifout waitin' fo' leave t'be granted, cuss it all t' tarnation. “WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING?” the director screamed, walking in with a piece of tissue paper stuck to his shoe. The cast and crew all burst out laughing. |
